You're so nebulous sometimes
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
