She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
