You really coming over, don't trick.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
