come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
