so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
