The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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