So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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