You just made me feel so damn special
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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