Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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