Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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