you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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