hell yes lets make some ravioli
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
