Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
