do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize