I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
pray to the hookup gods
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
