I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
