i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
