Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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