we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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