Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
