Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I just found puke in my bra..
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Randomize
