that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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