And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i think my tv is drunk
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
