In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
