It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
