we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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