I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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