either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
