You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
