my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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