she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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