1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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