quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
