I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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