whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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