You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
