Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Randomize
