She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
