I'm drive I can fine osifer
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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