Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
