marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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