hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
