you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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