it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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