I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
