It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
