I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
