i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize