I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
