I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
